A Lifetime of Love

My pregnancy with Ruthie began like most of the others: an unexpected surprise. However, this pregnancy was different. It was harder on my body physically: my back and hips hurt from about month 6 on, making walking, sitting, or standing painful and moving around difficult; my hands and feet swelled, forcing me to wear one pair of flip flops every day, even to church; and I had headaches for many weeks straight for no apparent reason. Although I gained the typical (for me) 30 pounds, I gained it early in the pregnancy compared to my others. Also, unlike the others, I actually lost weight the last few weeks of the pregnancy because I simply lost my appetite. The weight of the baby sitting on my stomach just constantly left me feeling full. This was just an all-around different pregnancy experience for me, and one I really don't think I want to experience again. Another way this was an atypical pregnancy was the fact that I carried Ruthie for so long. All of my ot...

My dad and a close family friend (Donna) drove down from Ohio to visit us for Thanksgiving. They arrived around 1:30pm on Thanksgiving day. After some playtime with Grandpa and a tour of the house for Donna, the younger kids settled down for naps while Th and the adults chatted and  I finished up dinner preparations. We ate our Thanksgiving meal around 4:30pm, I cleaned up and then prepared dessert while the kids and other adults played outside, enjoying the unseasonably warm temperatures. Shortly before 7pm the kids came in and began their bedtime routines of showers/baths. We then sat and enjoyed a variety of desserts prepared by both Donna and myself. Once dessert was over, bedtime for the kids was not far behind, and by 8:30pm all of the adults were gathered in the living room for the evening. The busyness of the day left me exhausted and as I sat watching TV and chatting with the family, I realized I was having mild contractions...

As I've shared before, money is extremely tight as we prepare for the arrival of baby #6, upkeep and maintenance on the house, and feeding/caring for a large family. I have been trying to refinish some of the dressers we already have but we still needed a dresser for Taryn (baby #6). I was just going to make space down in my bedroom for her clothes until we had the money to buy something. Imagine my delight as we were driving home from Th's football banquet and passed a house where a woman was standing outside, removing knobs from a wooden dresser. TJ noticed her and mentioned to me that, for some reason, he thought she was going to be getting rid of it. We turned the van around and drove past again, and sure enough, she was carrying a drawer to the curb. We stopped and inquired about the dresser's fate, and she happily gave it to us. It is a solid wood dresser with lots of potential. I can't wait to muster up the energy to strip the paint and refinish it. ...

Last Spring I began couponing, trying to plan and prepare for purchasing a vehicle that would accommodate our growing family because I knew we would not have the money to pay for something fully with cash. That has been going well and I honestly hate buying something without a coupon (but sometimes we need certain items so I at least try to buy them during a sale). Anyway, my plan was in full swing and going great: our grocery budget was cut in half or more depending on the week and so I was able to save a few dollars. In August our budget shrunk unexpectedly. We took a whirlwind trip to Ohio to visit family. While we were gone, we received a phone call from the people watching our house informing us that our A/C wasn't working. By the time we got back home, the house had warmed up to a toasty 87 degrees!!! We ended up having to replace our entire A/C unit. It was definitely an unplanned expense! We also received notice that we have hail damage to our roof, meaning we need to ...

Whenever I am out in public with my children, I am often asked if I am going to have more children. I have even been asked if I believe in birth control (although, thinking about it, that is a very personal question to be asked by a stranger!!!).  I thought I would address my "beliefs" here. First of all, the bible clearly states that children are a gift from God (Psalm 127). Also, the Lord opens and closes the womb in His timing (just read the accounts of Leah and Rachel in Genesis). Any woman who has become pregnant and then had a miscarriage or stillbirth is proof of the Lord opening and closing her womb; it was not her choice or timing but rather all in the Lord's hands. Keeping these biblical viewpoints in mind, here are my beliefs. TJ and I do believe in birth control to a certain degree. We use barrier-method contraception (condoms and I am waiting to be fitted for a diaphragm) as opposed to the hormonal types (the pill, the patch, the shot, the ring, etc)...

We will be welcoming Taryn Eileen sometime this upcoming December... Pray for me as the Lord obviously believes I can handle another girl, although I have my doubts. ;)

It's almost time for me to have the baby's anatomy ultrasound, meaning soon we'll know what we're having. The problem- we don't have names picked out because we can't agree! I guess it's a good thing we still have 5 more months to reach a compromise. =) Here are the names I like (all for a boy): Tucker Tate Tobyn Townsend Here are the names TJ likes: Timothy (boy) Taryn (girl) If you have ideas or suggestions of 'T' names, please share them. As you can tell, I am open to pretty much anything that is unique and not traditional. TJ, on the other hand, prefers more traditional, common names (which is why my kids have "normal" middle names. :)  Thanks!

I had my regularly scheduled doctor's appointment yesterday.  Once I got called back to the room, I chatted with the doc about recent blood work and testing that was completed. We then talked about my next appointment and other testing that would be done at that time. She began the exam and as usual, listened for the baby's heartbeat using the dopplar machine. Except this time, it was only my heartbeat that could be heard. She continued searching, moving the dopplar up, down, and around in an attempt to hear something. Nothing. For about 5 minutes this continued, and as she searched, she kept reassuring me that she'd find it. I just lay there, fighting back tears and praying that the Lord would spare me the heartache and pain of losing another baby. I was battling my thoughts while at the same time reminding myself that God is good, and what He does is good, and that this was for my good. It was a long, fearful few minutes for me. The doc eventually gave up searching ...

I love the spring, When everything’s new. I love the blooming flowers And the chirping birds, too. I love the summer, No schedule to care. Swimming, park days, And of course shorts to wear. I love the autumn, When the air turns cool. The falling leaves, and kids’ go back to school. I love the winter, When the holidays near. Especially Christmas, ‘cause our new baby will be here! We are excited, Another blessing from above. God tells us in His word, He is good and full of love. Knowing this, we trust Him As God will provide. For our every need, Including a ride. We simply won’t fit, Into a mini-van any more, We’re maxed out, Stuffed full to the core. We’re considering an Excursion, Or perhaps a Suburb-an. I guess I’ll admit it, Maybe even a church van. Personally, I am striving to have "intentional faith." Trusting Him to guide me, just as His word saith. Pregnancy brings joy, but also I fear, So I'm trusting the Lord, for He...

Wednesday, March 10, 2010. The day God chose for Taylor Ann to make her debut into the world. I started to have contractions just as preschool dismissal began, around noon. They weren’t very close, happening only about once every 10-15 minutes or so. Once I got home, I told TJ I wasn’t feeling well. He offered to take the afternoon off but since the contractions weren’t unbearable or close together, I assured him it was okay to go back to work and I would call him around 4pm to give him an update. Plus, Teagan has therapy on Wednesday so her EI, Crystal, would be here with me for an hour if something drastically changed and I needed to go to the hospital. He agreed and off he went! During Teagan’s therapy, I mainly sat on the couch and relaxed because I just did not feel well. Every movement caused me to have a contraction and as anyone who has had children knows, they are painful! =) Crystal left about 2:30 and I loaded the kids up in the van and we picked up Th from school, returning...

I have to share how good the Lord has been to TJ and I over the past couple of weeks. . . About a month ago, I found out some friends from church were planning a baby shower for me. I was utterly surprised, to say the least. The shower was a couple of weeks ago and was wonderful! It was a scrapbook theme in which each guest decorated a scrapbook page, and at the end of the shower, I had a complete album for Taylor's first year. The scrapbook is gorgeous! Some of the pages are very elaborate and others are very simple; it is a nice balance and something I could have never completed on my own. The best part of the album is that each lady signed her name on the back so I know who created each page. I love it and will cherish it always! I will admit I got emotional during the shower simply at the thoughtfulness and planning of each person in attendance. Each guest not only created a scrapbook page, but they prepared dishes to share and just the fact that they came meant so much to me!...

I found this article on my friend Renee's blog and I thought it was very true, so I wanted to share it here, too. I copied the article and included my thoughts in italics. ;) From the National Catholic Register By: Matthew Archbold Why Big Families Might Be Easier A woman said to me recently that my five children were very well behaved. It’s one of the best things I can hear so I thanked her. Then she asked me “how do you do it with so many?” I told her that I don’t think I’d be a very good parent of one child or two. She didn ’t believe my answer but honest to goodness, I sometimes think that having many children is easier than just one. Why big families are easier: Patience. I never have to teach patience. My children know that I can’t drop everything for them if I have a baby in my arms. Depending on the time of day, I may or may not have a baby in my arms. However, no matter what time it is, I often find myself saying, "You're going to have to wait." And than...

I had my routine doctor visit this morning. Weight gain is good (only about 21 pounds) and Taylor sounds great, the only concern was some protein in my urine. The doctor wasn't overly concerned because my blood pressure was normal, but in all of my other 4 pregnancies I've never had this. I suppose I am more concerned because of what my sister just experienced (same symptoms- protein in the urine but normal b/p). She ended up being hospitalized for 3 days before finally being induced. As much as I am ready to meet Taylor and end this pregnancy, I don't want it to be under those circumstances. I also have an ear infection, which is no fun. So do Teagan and T.G. We are all 3 on antibiotics although now tonight T.G. started running a fever. I'm not sure what to think now! I am hoping we are all feeling better by the time Monday rolls around. I've been sick since mid-January and I am ready to move on and get well!! The doctor also reminded me that I could potentially be...

I realize it’s been a couple of weeks since my last post, and I thought I would take a moment to share what’s been happening around our house. . . Th lost another tooth so he is now missing both of his front teeth. He looks so cute!! They have both been loose since before Christmas, and he lost the first one a few days after New Year’s. Now that both are gone, some of his words sound strange and I kid him that Teagan now has more teeth than he does. He just smiles his toothless grin and gives me a hug. Teagan started speech therapy and I already love her therapist Susan. She is very much “special ed” so I get what she says. I can talk to her and she knows what I mean-- I love it!! Right now we are working on feeding issues, meaning we are trying to get Teagan to accept different textures of food. For instance, when feeding her peach yogurt, Teagan will manage to swallow the yogurt and spit out the tiny specs of peaches. I know it’s not related to taste because Teagan loves pureed peach...

As I have shared before, I have been learning a lot over the past few months about trusting God, particularly in uncertain times. The Lord continues to allow circumstances in my life to force me to rely on Him even though it is often very difficult. Why is it so difficult? It’s not because God isn’t faithful. It’s also not because God means evil or harm for my life. No, it’s because I’m impatient and have my own plan on how things should be. Also, because I am human and can’t predict the future, I can’t see the many details the Lord is working out in my life, appearing as if nothing is happening when in truth it's just a matter of trusting in the Lord to handle the small details. Our house has been on the market for about 3 months. Honestly I expected to have been moved into a bigger house already. I thought we’d be settled in and preparing to welcome Taylor. Now, with no more than 11 weeks before Taylor makes her grand entrance into the world (probably more like 7 or 8), I am stre...

Life Beautiful by Margaret McSweeney During a quiet moment after Thanksgiving, I started reading my parents' stack of love letters that I recently found in a storage box. As a Christmas gift to you, I would like to share my father's words to my mother written to her during Christmas 1949. This incredible "hug from heaven" has been a tangible affirmation that Pearl Girls has true meaning and great worth for women throughout the world. I pray that God will continue to bless this ministry and outreach. May we all realize that the grit in our lives can be transformed into grace through the love of God. This is what I found written on a tiny folded card inscribed with "Christmas Greetings" on the front: Christmas 1949 My Dearest Carolyn, Truly a jewel is a thing of beauty, but a life that is lived to serve others and to glorify our Christ, such as yours, is my dearest, a far surpassing gem in radiance and beauty. Pearls to me, symbolize this "Life Beautifu...

A Psalm of David. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; my cup runs over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. ~Psalm 23 ********************************************************** I have been thinking about Twin A a lot this past week. I don’t know why, but I have been. And I still get sad and cry, mourning the little life that once was. This morning, in my daily bible reading, I read this passage. It is a very familiar passage as I’ve read it numerous other times. But, for some reason, today I really too...

For those who don’t already know, last Saturday we found out we are expecting another girl. TJ picked the name Taylor, and her middle name will be Ann, after my feisty 95-year-old Italian grandmother. Personally I was hoping for a boy simply since my last two children have been girls, but the important thing is that she is healthy and seems to be doing well. I go back to the doctor in about 2 weeks, but I can feel her kicking and moving around so that is very reassuring in terms of her well-being. I still think Twin A was a boy and it’s funny because when the boys talk about Twin A, they also refer to “him”, too. The Christmas season is upon us in full-force! At preschool we are busy decorating ornaments and other gifts for the children to give to their parents, practicing songs for our Christmas performance on the last day of school, and I am implementing cookie baking/decorating as part of the children’s learning the final few days of preschool. At home we are still trying to find a ...

Tomorrow is the big day! My mom and sis have been planning this baby shower since mid-August. I am excited as I haven't received any new "baby gear" since Th's birth over 7 years ago. May not seem like a long time ago but considering my stuff has gone through 4 children, it's definitely worn and seen better days. :) I am not as excited about finding out what I'm having as I thought I would be. It's not that I'm not excited, but part of me feels like I am having a girl and Twin A was a boy. I will never know for sure until I reach Heaven, but it's a feeling I've had since I found out about the twins. I suppose a part of me is thinking that by finding out the gender of the other, I am confirming my suspicions. Does that make sense? Regardless, I am happy and thankful that I am now able to feel the baby move, helping to lessen my fears with each kick. I have been feeling movement for a few weeks, but as I get further along, the movements are more ...

I have gone through a gamut of emotions as a result of the death of Twin A. However, I can honestly say that I have learned more about the Lord in the past 2 months than I have over the course of the past several years. It has been a difficult journey for our family as we were all excited about the arrival of the babies, but the good news is that God is faithful and will never leave us nor forsake us, especially when times are tough and life seems to be at its worst. The Lord has shown me that He is good and what He does is good, and it was good for me to experience this trial. It was created just for me and the Lord will see me through it. I have difficulty trusting others and the one major thing I have learned is that God is trustworthy. There was a point where I did not think so, but when I read my Bible and realized that the only other option was to not trust God, than I really had no choice. If I do not trust God, than I either trust in myself or in someone else. I have been let d...