A Lifetime of Love

This week brought about a major life event, and truthfully I am still processing it.  My oldest child, Thomas, graduated from high school. He is officially an adult. My parenting journey with him is finished. At this point, I can only offer him advice.  He is fully responsible for the choices he makes, as well as the consequences.   18 summers. That is what we, as parents, are given to influence, mold, discipline, and train our children so that when the time comes, they are responsible, contributing members of society. It is an arduous task that at times seemed not worth the effort. But, looking back, there really isn’t much I would do differently except perhaps cherish the time we had together. While the days were so, so long, the time has passed quickly! I look back at old photos and the memories they invoke seems like they happened just yesterday. Homeschooling Thomas afforded me the gift of time with him, and if nothing else, that alone made the stresses of...

Wow. It feels so weird to be writing again. It has literally been YEARS since I typed a blog post. Like, I've had 2 more kids since the last time I wrote anything. So why am I writing now? Well, several reasons. First, at the urging of a friend (thanks Vanessa!), I thought it was time. I went through a tough season of life where finding time to blog just wasn't possible. And not blogging isn't what made that season tough, to be clear. Rather, it was just impossible with the demands of my family. 9 kids in 14 years. Let that sink in. Second, I think when people are truthful about their experiences, it makes them more relatable. I have shared openly about my struggles as a mom and wife pretty much from day one of starting this blog. Having so many children in such a short time span, I definitely understand the fears and frustrations that come with mothering. The times when sleep deprivation and potty training and wanting later curfews all blend together. I.get.it. Thi...

For many years now, the Lord has given me a burden for moms. A burden to encourage them in their mothering journey and share what I have learned in my own (good and bad) experiences. I cannot begin to count how often I hear the comment, "I don't know how you do it. You are amazing." While I don't necessarily feel amazing, the comment just solidifies my heart's desire to share with others. I have been thinking about how to do this and I came up with an idea. I would like to get together with a group of moms (stay-at-home, working, older kids, younger kids. If you're a mom, you're invited!) on a monthly basis for about 2 hours. During this time, we would discuss a topic related to mothering, being a wife, running a household, etc. We would study in-depth what the Scripture has to say about the topic, and practical tips and ways to apply it to our lives. Of course there would be food because (I love food!) no gathering can be complete without it. So wha...

God desires to have an intimate relationship with His children, and ashamedly I found myself too busy and distracted to take time for Him.   As a mom of young children, including an infant, sleepless nights are par for the course. In the past, I didn't have any trouble waking early to spend time alone with the Lord, reading my bible and praying. However, the past 18 months or so, I find myself tired all.the.time. I go to bed with good intentions, setting my alarm to ring well before the children wake. But, after waking 2, 3, or even 4 times each night, morning comes too quickly. I sleep until the last possible moment before having to wake up to get the kids ready for the day. Alone time with God will have to wait until later.... When I participated in my church's Ladies' Bible Study, I would find time to complete the weekly assignments, albeit most were rushed and more to "get them done" than to learn and grow as a Christian. This (school) year, I decided not...

I will admit I don't spend as much time in my bible as I should. However, I make it a point to pray as soon as I am alone with the Lord in the morning, which is usually while getting ready for the day. I try to pray through scripture because it helps me to meditate on verses I already know and is more than just "asking" for things to be done. One of the verses I pray through each day is Ephesians 4:1-3. It says, "I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love, endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." As I was praying that the Lord would help me to walk worthy of my calling, I began to think about what exactly my calling was. The verse is speaking to brothers and sisters in Christ, that we walk (act) in a way that pleases Jesus and honors His sacrifice on the cross. But it goes dee...

This Thanksgiving we broke tradition and hosted friends at our house instead of spending the day with family. The idea came about when our original plan of traveling to Ohio was scrapped and we heard that a family new to the area was going to be spending the day alone. It immediately brought back memories of our Air Force days, when holidays were spent gathered with close friends who felt like family. TJ and I knew breaking tradition might cause some riffs, but the Lord worked it all out for the best! I planned and prepared in the weeks leading up to Thanksgiving, and when I bought the turkey, I chose the largest one I could find. We were feeding 13 people so I chose one that was 15 pounds. It would be enough for the day, but I wasn't expecting leftovers. Our guests were bringing side dishes and desserts, and I was making additional sides and desserts, so I knew we would have plenty of food for the 13 of us. A few days before Thanksgiving, I ran into a long-time friend of m...

Yesterday during our history time, the Lord allowed me to have a glimpse into my son's heart. We were learning about the prophet Amos. Although he was from Judah, God called him to go preach in the land of Israel because the Israelites had stopped relying on the Lord.  As we were discussing the reasons why (wealth, peace with neighboring countries, surplus of food and supplies), he casually mentioned that he didn't rely on the Lord, either. When I questioned him further, I learned that my son (who will remain anonymous) responded that he didn't have any reason to- he didn't fight in battles (against other countries), he wasn't wandering in the wilderness, waiting to enter the Promised Land, he wasn't being ruled by a harsh king who was a direct enemy of the Lord, etc. How did I interpret his response? Like this: he didn't know how to rely on God. I put the brakes on our history lesson and had a wonderful opportunity to explain to him what relying on God l...

The title of this post is the name of a CD put out by one of my favorite evangelist groups, The Pettit Team. It is also the name of a song on that CD. (You can listen here ). The song reminds Christians to keep a heavenly focus, that one day our troubles will be gone as we sit in the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. I thought the meaning of the song was a wonderful parallel to my present "season" of life. A few years ago, in the midst of one of my children throwing a temper tantrum, someone told me that my life as a mother was eventually going to get easier. My children would grow, and the older ones would be a help to the younger ones. I wasn't going to be in this "season" of having young children forever. I remember taking the encouragement at face value; the stress of my present situation was so emotionally draining that it was difficult to imagine my life any different. As the years have passed, I have obviously added more children to my family, but that...

TJ and I celebrated our 14th anniversary last Wednesday. No, fourteen years is not going to break the record for having the longest marriage, and it's not considered a "milestone" year in any way. But, to me it's significant because we have worked really hard to make our marriage last. Not just last, but honor God and be a good example for our children in the process.       When we married, I was 20 years old. I had never met his family, and he had only met my family once. We had our families' blessings to get married, but it didn't come without many, many warnings of "Don't you think you're too young?" and "Don't you think you should wait a little while longer?" Speaking only for myself, I knew TJ was "the one" for me before we started dating. No, it was not "love at first sight" or anything like that.  In fact, it was quite the opposite.  TJ and I worked together while in the Air Force. He asked ...

I am sharing the link to this post because it really encouraged me... It seems like I live my life defending my choice to have many children instead of celebrating them. I have heard just about every comment and snide remark a person can make about children, mothering, and preventing more children from coming along. These remarks have come from strangers, family, and even an OB doctor at the practice I use. Why? Because our society does not embrace children as much as it says it does. Abortion wouldn't exist if it did. There would be more large families if it did. Pregnancy would be more celebrated instead of questioned. And mothers like me would not feel ashamed to walk the aisles of the grocery store with all of her children, afraid of what comments she will hear or questions her children will have to field. So, for all the moms out there reading this, whether you have one child or many children, do not be ashamed, embarrassed, or defensive. Instead, celebra...

This post is simply a public expression of thanksgiving to God for all that He has provided us over the past few months. Here are the specifics: *We knew last summer that we would be needing a new(er) vehicle as TJ's van (our only vehicle that could hold all 8 of us) was showing signs of its age and wear, particularly with the transmission. The goal was to keep up the maintenance on it for as long as possible until it was no longer safe to drive. On one of our trips to Ohio, we drove a rented Toyota Sienna while TJ's van was being repaired after a minor accident he was involved in. It was very spacious and had plenty of cargo space for all of us plus our luggage and gear. As a result, we discussed buying either a Honda Odyssey or Toyota Sienna when the time came to replace his van. I will admit, I wanted a new van sooner than later, and hoped that TJ would one day soon announce his decision that it was "time". When I found out I was pregnant in November, immediate...

Thomas completed 5th grade and his third year of homeschooling, and Tanner completed 2nd grade and his first year of homeschooling. I am being completely honest when I share that, although challenging at times, this was the best school year yet! Adding Tanner to the mix meant some scheduling changes needed to be made, but once we established a routine that worked, our days passed quickly and the weeks, and inevitably the months, passed even quicker. 1st day of school- August 2012 I personally enjoyed watching both boys learn, grow, and mature over the course of the year. My favorite subject to "teach" them was history as we focused our studies on the Old Testament. I learned so much about God, the Israelites, and how it all relates to not only the New Testament, but to present day living. I know the boys did, too! After reading our daily passage, we often talked about how it applies to our lives today, or how we are/were like a particular person we read about in the...

I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand. The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life. The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forevermore. ~Psalm 121 I have read this Psalm many times and I was always a little stumped as to why it used the word "keep" when talking about what God the Father does for His children... and then tonight it made sense to me (so much so that I just had to share!). The word "keep" doesn't mean "prevent," like I originally thought, but rather it means "protect." What an incredible...

It's hard to believe school is out for Thomas already. We have had a fun year full of great learning experiences. Below are some pictures of learning in action! September: Latta Plantation Homeschool Day Learning the 3 R's (Reading, Writing, & 'Rithmetic) Reading from a McGuffy Reader Learning about clothing styles & medicine from the 1700s on- VERY interesting! October: Riverbanks Zoo   Our science curriculum is broken down into the various days of creation. This year we started with Day 5: the flying creatures. Megabat- this year we learned the difference between a microbat and a megabat. :) November: Carolina Raptor Center  This field trip only enhanced what we were learning about & was probably Thomas' favorite since he has developed a passion for birding thanks to his study in science this year.  We felt a sense of honor & pride seeing our National Bird up close & in person. Red-tail Hawk: our favorite!! ...

My last post was so gloomy, and I'm happy to say my perspective has definitely improved over the past couple of weeks. With the help of others, I have implemented a new chore chart and I cannot express enough how much smoother our house runs now. The kids each have their own daily chart that is just for their bedrooms. It includes 4 items (each worth 25 cents) that have to be done daily (for a maximum weekly allowance of $5 if all check marks are received). The goal is to have the chores completed each morning, but I have made allowances to the time I check because Annie has learned how to open doors and will literally trash a room in a matter of seconds. The boys have started locking their door when they finish their chores so that she can't go in there before I have a chance to check their room...they learned from experience. =) I also implemented a weekly cleaning chore that pretty much covers the entire house. There are a co...

Lately I have been feeling overwhelmed. Very overwhelmed. By laundry, dishes, cleaning, children, places to be, homeschooling, I could go on. I was having such a difficult time getting into a routine because I have also been plagued by fatigue. I, like the majority of people, wake up each day with a "list" of things to accomplish for the day. Mine is not really very interesting and includes items such as picking up toys, vacuuming, dishes, preparing meals, etc. The problem came when lunch time hit. Whatever wasn't completed by lunch was added to the list for tomorrow because my energy was gone. Every day around the same time (1-2pm) I found myself having difficulty thinking clearly and feeling kind of dizzy. The only thing that would help was to rest for a few minutes (as long as the children would allow- the most was 20 minutes!). I have been to two separate doctors who practice in separate offices hoping to find an answer as to why I have been feeling this way. I re...